Eveything just hurts today.

I had a wonderful talk with you. You seem not to notice that. I don’t realize i’m gushing all over your replies. That makes me sad. It’s because i can’t seem to tell you how i really feel about you.

It’s true. We are continents apart. I’m from the future and you are from the past. You are everywhere, here and there and i am just in my limited world. You are my window to whatever is outside my four poster bed. I lived for you.

Sometimes, it’s hard to even be vulnerable in your presence because within those times, you are the most insensitive person on earth. But who am i to blame? You don’t know anything of what i feel. You don’t know anything at all.

How i smile when i saw your ID blinking on my screen. Or how i fuzzy inside when i hear your little voice. Everything about you is overwhelming. Everything about you is perfect. Is it the fact that i like you? Or i am too jealous and conceited that i want your life? Whichever i know it is you.

If you only knew. If you only knew. You wouldn’t talk to me at all. Maybe finding me is next to impossible. Maybe i’ll just lay here in my bed and die of nothing. Nothing to be brave about. Nothing to say to my future because i wouldn’t have one.

I live for you. I exist because of your presence.

Die.